Can you guys let me know if i should change anything?

One of my major interests is swimming. I have been swimming for about 13 years. This is a major part of my life because it helps me stay in shape and also allows me to become more social and connect with people who have the same interests as me. Swimming helps me with education because I can meet someone who is older than me that can guide me through my college years, and I can also meet some one younger than me that I can guide through their college years. Hanging out with my friends is something I do a lot because it is important not to stress myself out by only concentrating on my school work. It is important for me to balance out my life between school work and a social life. I have always been interested in making people鈥檚 lives easier and I am also exceptional at solving problems. These qualities guided me towards the career goals I set for myself: social work.

My first choice career that I want to become is a social worker for DCF. I want to do this because I love kids and teenagers and I loathe seeing cases where the children need guidance to turn them back down the right road and they are not getting it. I also want to protect children from anything that may harm them and I would like to improve family鈥檚 lives just to make it a little easier for them. My second choice career is to become a counseling psychologist in a high school because I can also help teenagers, but in more of a way guiding them through tough times. I want to be able to be someone who teenagers can turn to if they just need to talk with someone they can trust.

In ten years from now, when I am 27 years old, I want to be graduated from college with a bachelor鈥檚 degree in psychology and a master鈥檚 degree in social work. I also want to be working at DCF as a social worker. Also, in ten years from now I want to start making an impact on the world, not so much as being famous, but as a person. I want to be a person who made an impact on someone鈥檚 life. Some ways I want to do this is by guiding a person back on track or protecting a child that needs to be protected. I want to make the world just a little bit better for teenagers and children to live in. In ten year from now, I want to be married and thinking about kids or have one on it way. I also want to be living in a house with at least four bedrooms. I do not want money to be an issue with my family; with the help of my husband I want to be able to support my family.
Can you guys let me know if i should change anything?
Conceptually it is fine. There are some areas to improve the readability. For example



In ten years from now, when I am 27 years old, I want to be graduated from college with a bachelor鈥檚 degree in psychology and a master鈥檚 degree in social work.



Would be better as:



Ten years from now, when I am 27 years old, I want to have a bachelor鈥檚 degree in psychology and a master鈥檚 degree in social work.



You might look at just cleaning up areas like this. DA
Can you guys let me know if i should change anything?
Nope, it's peachy keen!

xp

grown dutch rabbit